A Coaching Approach for Work/Life Balance

Cindy Nixon-Witt

The "life coaching" profession is growing exponentially. Here's a look at why individuals, organizations, and businesses are trying it out.

Sidebar

In the not-so-distant past, I assumed that when I couldn’t deal with life completely on my own, it was a sign of weakness or failure. In 1999 while managing a full-time career, three children, and life after divorce, I discovered my life coach. She helped me stay focused on my goals, supported me as I dealt with some major health issues, and provided tools and resources for me to re-discover my passion and find balance in my chaotic world.

After five months of coaching sessions, I realized that investing in training to become a life coach, as a career, was the way I could live most purposefully.

With the introduction of the life coaching profession during the past 15 years, more individuals, businesses, and organizations have sought life coaching, too, in order to achieve higher levels of success, confidence, and balance – both personally and professionally.

In 2006, Pricewaterhouse Coopers found professional coaching to be a $1.5 billion global industry, with an estimated 30,000 coaches worldwide.

The coaching profession is growing exponentially. Statistics from the International Coach Federation indicate there are presently 11,000 members in 80 countries. In 2006, PricewaterhouseCoopers found professional coaching to be a $1.5 billion global industry, with an estimated 30,000 coaches worldwide.

Why the increased interest in life coaching? Well, how do we learn to build a solid personal foundation or to take the lead in the business world? Where were we taught how to balance family, finances, health, careers, and living with enjoyment? We were taught the essentials in school: reading, writing, and math. But are they everything we need to create the life of our dreams? Moreover, when was the last time you took some time to think about your dreams, aspirations, and goals? Do you take action each day towards doing or being what you imagine for yourself, your career, family, or business? Do you enjoy life with a sense of well-being while feeling focused and achieving the goals you envision?

People who decide they need a little help in these areas can find a professional coach to help them design their own personal productivity program or business success program - and then integrate it into their lives.

A real-life example may help explain how life coaches work. (The names and details in this and the other two coaching scenarios following have been changed to protect the clients’ privacy.) Sally, a sales manager for eight years with a major wholesale food corporation and one of my recent clients, had her career interrupted when the company went through a major downsizing. She then relocated to another state to work as a consultant on opening a large restaurant in a resort area. As a previous restaurant owner-manager with more than 25 years in the food industry, however, Sally quickly realized that her values were in total conflict with the owner who had hired her.

With coaching and a commitment to results and accountability, Sally decided to return to her home state, choosing to be nearer her family. She then accepted a sales position that didn’t require the physical demands and intensive travel schedule of her previous job.

The International Coach Federation (ICF), the global professional organization for coaches, defines coaching as partnering with clients in a thought-provoking and creative process that inspires them to maximize their potential.

Professional coaches provide an ongoing partnership designed to help clients produce fulfilling results in their personal and professional lives. Coaches aim to help their clients experience fresh perspectives on personal challenges and opportunities, enhance their thinking and decision-making skills, improve their interpersonal effectiveness, and increase their confidence in carrying out their chosen work and life roles.

Coaches are trained to listen, to observe, and to customize their approach to individual client needs. Coaches seek to elicit solutions and strategies from the client, whom they believe is naturally creative and resourceful. The coach’s job is to provide support to enhance the skills, resources, and creativity that the client already possesses.2

A life coach, like an athletic coach, will:

• support clients by providing a structure that creates consistency through regular coaching sessions similar to a systematic workout schedule

• embrace and develop a client’s strengths, and work together to improve the areas that need attention

• empower clients to stretch beyond what they think are their capabilities.

• ensure that clients identify their purpose or mission

• work with clients over an established time period—success doesn’t happen in a single workout or in a single coaching session

• provide encouragement, empowerment, and additional insight, giving clients an edge they wouldn’t have on their own

• assist clients in achieving their desired results and naming their dreams—having more money or more intimate relationships, being more productive or organized, or finding fulfillment and balance

Here is another real-life example. Joanne, a director of admissions at an educational institution, was in the middle of divorce proceedings. She had a court hearing pending and wanted to finalize the financial issues with her spouse prior to the hearing in order to eliminate lengthy attorney negotiations. During an early coaching session, Joanne also confided that she was becoming increasingly impatient with her office staff and felt they were not as productive as they should have been.

I suggested we do some out-of-the-box, creative thinking about her options prior to the court hearing. Within ninety minutes, Joanne realized that a demanding and authoritarian attitude would not give her the results she wanted from her husband. With her new attitude and a few new proposals to consider, he was willing to work with her on a plan prior to the court hearing.

Joanne also realized she could use the same process with her staff members to encourage communication about productivity issues. In her final evaluation, Joanne said she had “learned to step back, take a look at a specific situation, and adjust how I would approach it—from my usual direct and sometimes harsh style of communication to a softer approach, a more non-confrontational approach. It is definitely less stressful for me and does not raise my blood pressure.”

The coach's job is to provide support to enhance the skills, resources, and creativity that the client already possesses.

Since coaching is a new profession and certification and licensure is not yet required in most states or in other countries, there are many individuals today who call themselves coaches. But they may not have been formally trained in specific coaching skills; instead, they are transferring skill sets from other professions into their coaching. Often this results in an inadequate or ineffective coaching experience for clients.

Hiring a coach credentialed by the ICF and trained by a recognized ICF coach certification program is important. It means the coach:

• has received professional training from a program specifically designed to teach coaching skills in alignment with the ICF Competencies and Code of Ethics

• has demonstrated a proficient understanding and use of the coaching competencies as outlined by the ICF

• is accountable to the ethics and standards set forth by the ICF

The ICF recommends doing the following in selecting a coach, as well:

1. Educate yourself about coaching. Hundreds of articles have been written about it in the last three to five years.

2. Know your objectives for working with a coach.

3. Interview three coaches before you decide on the one for you. Ask them about their experience, qualifications, and skills – and ask for at least two references.

4. Remember that coaching is an important relationship. There should be a connection between you and the coach that feels right to you.3

Having a supportive friend in life is wonderful, yet coaches have objectivity and an emotional distance that can't be expected of supportive friends.

There are core differences between coaching and consulting. Consulting provides short-term solutions projected onto the client, while coaching is a continual relationship that assists in implementing new skills, changes, and both short- and long-term goals. Another difference is that consultants often provide advice, while coaches encourage clients to use their creativity to discover solutions on their own. This helps to build clients’ self-esteem so that they can trust their own decisions and rely less on outside help in the future.

And what of coaching versus therapy? Coaching and therapy differ because while therapy focuses on the past to explore current issues and behaviors, coaching focuses on today – and tomorrow – as it provides a supportive environment to design strategies needed to resolve the issues at hand.

Having a supportive friend in life is wonderful, yet coaches have objectivity and an emotional distance that can’t be expected of supportive friends. And, a coach is a professional who works on various aspects of the client’s life and provides honesty and different perspectives.

This was the situation with Bill, who worked in the technology department of a major corporation. When he called me for an appointment, Bill had just received a challenging mid-year evaluation from his supervisor. While he had tried many different ways to stay organized, Bill felt he wasn’t accomplishing what was demanded at work; hence, both his health and his home environment were suffering.

Bill and I began meeting every two weeks. We assessed his satisfaction level in each of his life areas, prioritized projects, and established detailed, specific actions and timelines for each project. With a major work project deadline pending, Bill focused on detailing action steps and scheduled specific times to work on the project. Regular coaching sessions, telephone calls, and e-mails established an accountability process to help Bill stay on track and move towards his goal. And, by identifying and working through the obstacles that normally would stunt his momentum, Bill gained confidence as he moved towards completion of the project.

Eventually, Bill also realized it was okay to ask for more support at work and at home. He met with a financial planner to more clearly define his present and future money goals, and he began taking time to exercise with a buddy three times a week. The result? Bill completed the project on time and received compliments from his supervisor. During our final session, Bill told me he was applying the same strategies and calendaring techniques he was using at work to projects at home that had long been on his “to do” list.

People who are thinking about engaging a life coach might want to take this little test. If your answers are “yes,” you might consider taking the plunge.

Ready
• I have time to invest in myself.
• I can make and keep appointments with myself to work on this material.
• There is a gap between where I am and where I want to be.

Willing
• I am fully willing to do the work required to get me where I want to go.
• I am willing to stop or change the self-defeating behaviors that limit my success.
• I am willing to try new things even if I am not 100 percent convinced they will work.

Able
• Coaching is the appropriate discipline for the changes I want to make (rather than therapy or a twelve-step program).
• I have the patience to take consistent action toward my goals, regardless of how immediate the results are.
• I have the support I need to make significant changes with ease (i.e., family or company buy-in).4. ¨

Click here to return to top

Take a moment, and on a scale from 1-10 give a number to each area according to how satisfied you are feeling in each of these Life Areas today. (1 is low, 10 is high)1

LIFE AREAS

___ APPEARANCE                 ___ CAREER                    ___ FAMILY
___ FRIENDS                           ___ FUN                            ___ HEALTH
___ HOME                                ___ MONEY                     ___ PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT
___ RELATIONSHIP               ___ SERVICE                   ___ SPIRITUAL DEVELOPMENT

What are your Life Areas needing some attention? If each of these areas represented the amount of air in the tire of your car, what would it be like to ride in this car? Balanced? Bumpy? Flat? Pick your Life Area needing the most attention. Can you think of some ways to nourish this Life Area? What are your biggest obstacles in this Life Area? What are some ways to overcome these obstacles? Who supported you when you learned how to drive a car? Could you have learned to drive by yourself as effectively and efficiently?

Endnote

Click on note number to return to text.

1  Success Unlimited Network, http://www.successunlimitednet.com.

2  The International Coach Federation, http://www.coachfederation.org/ICF.

3  Ibid.

4  Laura Berman Fortgang, Take Yourself to the Top, Warner Books (1998).